Weighed in this morning at 125.8. While I don’t mind the number, it goes without saying that I’d much rather be 132 and running without a femoral stress fracture. Sigh. It is getting quite emotionally difficult to see people out for runs, because I want so badly to get out there myself. Not because I want to lose weight or burn calories – I’m quite fine maintaining – but because I crave the movement – the moment when my breath, stride, and music are all in matching cadence – the feeling of satisfaction after hard exercise. I miss it terribly.
I’ve been thinking about things I used to believe – about weight loss, about myself. Here’s a quick rundown:
I used to believe… that I had a “large frame.”
Now I know… that my frame is actually VERY small. A size 2 is a very healthy size *for me.* I get a substantial double chin at 133 pounds. It’s kind of ridiculous.
I used to believe… that my genetics dictated that I would be larger.
Now I know… that genes aren’t everything, and even if I am predisposed to gain weight, it’s not inevitable.
I used to believe… that I’d be stuck with blood sugar issues forever.
Now I know… that even though I tend to be sensitive to blood sugar fluctuations, I can manage them easily with diet and exercise.
I used to believe… that I could judge what was healthy for me based on what was healthy for other people, and I could lose weight successfully if I just did what (insert blogger name here) did.
Now I know… that everyone is SO different that it makes very little sense to compare oneself to anyone else – whether in weight loss, eating, exercise, or life.
I used to believe… that I wasn’t strong enough to lose the weight.
Now I know… that I AM because I DID.
I used to believe… that exercise and happy movement were not for me.
Now I know… that not only can I run, but I love to run!
I used to believe… that weight loss had to be a fight against my body.
Now I know… that, for me, weight loss was largely a side effect of taking care of my body and feeding it well.
If you’ve lost weight – how have your beliefs changed?